Soaking It Up

 CC outside a few weeks ago, rocking brother's hat.

CC outside a few weeks ago, rocking brother's hat.

Y'all! How is it already August?! I know Michael's started putting up their fall merchandise back in the spring but still, it's starting to get legit now. Summer is almost over. Back home, down south everyone is starting to register for school and some have already started back (excuse me while I go have a good cry over the fact that my baby sister just started her Senior year of high school!!!) while up here in New York, we are all scrambling to soak up the last month before school starts. I know some parents are ready for Labor Day to come and go so their children are back in the teacher's hands. While I must admit that I'm looking forward to Bo going back to school and starting his 4K year (he LOVES school), I'm not chomping at the bit for summer to end. For me, summer ending means buckets (or shovels, rather) of snow are just around the corner and though I'm a glass-half-full type of person, let me be honest in saying ain't nobody got time for that!

Yesterday was my sister-in-law's birthday so after church me, Rob and the kids hopped on our little boat and met the family near Cupsogue Beach (for those of you who may read this and don't have a clue where I'm talking about, it's in the Hamptons...West Hampton to be exact). It was CC's first time on a boat and also the first time she'd ever been in a lifejacket; needless to say she was hating life but she warmed up to the idea of being a live version of "Randy" from A Christmas Story. The weather was gorgeous and aside from some choppiness on the way out to the island, it felt like I was back home on the lake. Seeing all the boats and jet skis out, people actually waving at you and enjoying themselves on a beautiful Sunday afternoon, it took me back home and gave me one of those random feelings of contentment. Rob driving the boat as I clung to our two kids, then spending time with family, doing absolutely nothing but hanging out, it was a really good feeling. I hope we have more weekends like that.

I often find myself wondering where we're going to be in a year...five years...10. I definitely did not see myself still living here when I left South Carolina nearly eight years ago. It's still so surreal even typing that amount of years. Will we end up staying here on Long Island and watching our kids grow up on the water? Will we relocate down south and watch them grow up in the open fields? These thoughts used to send me into a tizzy, feeling like I needed to know right now what tomorrow holds but when I get that urge, I now take a time out and remember that God has tomorrow and He trying to show me something in today. Regardless of what the future holds, time sure does fly...but it snails along at times too. I really feel like since having kids, the months and years go by so quickly. I'm forcing myself to reevaluate where my time is spent lately. As drawn to work and creating things as I tend to be at times, when Bo asks me to sit down and play with PlayDoh, I do it. When CC brings books to me because she wants to be read to, I stop what I'm doing to sit on the floor and read them to her even if she's only still for a millisecond. Time is fleeting and as the saying goes, "babies don't keep." I know I've mentioned it before but for the past year or so, Bo has brought us to a season of needing a lot of patience and navigating his strong-willed personality. It's on the not-so-fun days of tantrums and constant discipline that I feel like life is moving at a snail's pace. I find myself thinking, When is this phase/season going to be over?! Is it always going to be like this? A battle of the wills. But often times in the same thought, I remember that he's still so little and we have really really good days like yesterday that trump the bad ones. I consider the fact that I'd take the bad days over the thought that my baby boy, my first born, the one who made me a mama is growing so quickly and won't be a baby much longer. It's surreal to think that Bo will be four years old in just a few weeks. I get ahead of myself and ponder the realization that next year he'll be starting Kindergarten...that's a tough pill to swallow.

So for now, while it's still beautiful and sunny out, and while my babies are still babies, I'm going to do all that I can to soak each moment up of what we have left of summer. It's hard at times because I get tunnel vision and I think of everything on my to-do list that I feel I must cross off but then I think about five years from now, how I will have an almost 9 year old and a 6 year old who are going to be independent and not need mommy to hold them anymore. It's so sad to think about but I know God brings us into each season with a whole lot of grace, and thankfully babies don't grow up overnight, though at times it seems that they do.

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